Writing a synopsis and sticking pins in eyes comes to mind

OK, to clarify I of course mean sticking pins in my own eyes, not just randomly running up to someone in the street and attacking them with implements from my sewing box. No, I genuinely would rather gut myself than have to write this... But I've done it anyway.

Now, there are some agents who want a full synopsis consisting of no more than 4 pages, and then there are others who want no more than 500 words. Meh (my brain gags at the thought) if I could keep things under 500 words than I'd be writing short stories too.
1) Pick out key points... My whole book is key points.
2) Convey character emotions... In 500 words are you joking?
3)Don't lose the plot - Did that years ago.

So, after a short break away visiting family and friends, and a painfully long journey back on the M6 (which is another story), I sat down and began.
I started by writing the synopsis as Girl meets boy, boy does this, girl does this, boy screws up etc. I then changed boy and girl to the characters names, and then worked on it until something somewhat decent was left. That was 487 words. A few people have read it over and they have said it can be cut more. More? Would a synopsis of 'They meet, they fight, and then the twist..' suffice? I have read so many blogs, authors, writers and more on this subject, and still it seems to be down to one thing - Sitting down and just doing it.

I have also created a spreadsheet of Agents to send submissions to, using the Writers and Artists yearbook 2016. If I can get just one asking for a full MS out of the 10 or so I'm submitting to, then i'll know I've done something right. Otherwise, I'll just try and try again. Beats sitting on my butt scratching my head and picking my nose anyway.

If what I have written is any good, then I will of course share with you what I have done, but if it's pants and ends me in the round file then I wouldn't want anyone facing the same fate through my own errors. Instead I will write a what not to send, kind of like what not to say on a first date post.

Will keep you all updated on the progress...

:-)

Watchers Chapter Three

Watchers

Chapter Three

The house was nice, with its clean walls and wooden floors, but to Ciana it wasn’t home. And more to the point, it was still filled with someone else’s belongings. Picture frames hung the walls, in them were just pictures of scenery with no one in the focal point. Ciana walked through the living room, noting how homely it felt but very empty at the same time.

“Ci,” Rhianne called from the kitchen. “Your room is the first on the left. Next to you is the spare room, that’s right we now have a spare room for visitors!” Her mum was so excited by that.

Ciana knew there was very little chance of anyone visiting. They had moved three hours away from her friends, from her school, from all the clothes shops a sixteen-year-old could want at her fingertips. Not to mention the cinema, fast-food shops and more she enjoyed with her friends every weekend. They had left that life to live here, a street where they were the only occupants. Even the Satnav had difficulty finding LittleBridge.

Rhianne walked through, carrying items to be placed in their new abode. “Your dad is unloading the van; can you start taking your stuff up to your room?”

“Sure,” she muttered.

“I know this is hard,” her mum leant against the wall. “And, I’m sorry we didn’t have much notice. You will miss your friends, but I promise this will all get easier. Once you start at the school, you’ll make new friends and this place will be perfect.”

“Sure,” Ciana muttered again. She was hurt, but there was absolutely nothing she could do about it. She picked up one of her boxes and climbed the wooden stair case.

“Ciana misses her boyfriend,” RJ laughed from the top step, turned around and ran his arms along his sides pretending he was kissing someone.

“Shut it!” Ciana warned.

“I’ll never forget you Greg,” he laughed again.

“I’m gonna kill you RJ!” On top of the box sat a mug that a friend had given her as a leaving gift. It said Friends Forever. Without thinking, Ciana grabbed the mug and threw it towards RJ’s head. It missed and smashed against the wall.

RJ laughed and ran into his room, slamming it shut so she couldn’t chase him.

She didn’t care now, she hadn’t meant to throw the gift, but she had. And now it sat in a million pieces across the floor.

“I’ll sweep it up!” Rhianne growled. Before Ciana could say anything she held her hands up, “I know, Okay, RJ is not making this any easier on you. He’s ten, and finding this as hard as you.”

“Funny way of showing it.”

“Just please try not to kill him, and please don’t break anything else. We’ve not even fully moved in yet and you’re both already trying to destroy this place.”

Her mum ushered her towards her room, and call RJ out. As Ciana closed her door, she could hear her mum telling RJ the same thing she had just told her.

The room was bigger than her old one. Against one wall was a bed, ready dressed, on the other wall was a wardrobe and a bookshelf, filled with books and other trinkets. There were more pictures in this room, each of scenery and no people.

 She dropped the box on the bed, kicking up a dust storm in the process.

“Gross,” she coughed, and rushed to open the window and air the room out. Her bedroom faced out on to the street, and the house she was looking at before. The birds were still in the trees, as she looked out the window, they seemed to turn in her direction and caw louder.

The box that sat on her bed toppled over and out fell the pictures of her friends. The photo’s that had been taken on the last day of school sprawled across the floor. Ciana picked them up, and looked them over with a sadness. Although they had promised to stay in touch, and meet up regularly, she knew it was unlikely to happen. They were all moving onto college where they would meet new friends, and Ciana would become nothing but the girl they used to know. She could feel the tears welling up in her eyes.

“Cries don’t cry,” she whispered, and wiped them away. It wasn’t true, because Ciana had cried many times at night when no one could see or hear her. She hadn’t wanted to move, and had even been offered to live at a friend’s house. But the thought of leaving them was too much for Ciana, and even RJ who most of the time she would rather throttle, she would miss him too.

“Not too shabby, eh Grumps?” Ryan placed some boxes just inside the door.

Ciana forced a smile, trying to cover how she really felt. She placed some of the pictures against the frames, and sat on the bed.

“Well, what do you think?” Ryan asked, dusting himself down.

Ciana shrugged. Her dad had always called her Grumps, because she was apparently a grumpy baby wyo turned into an equally grumpy teenager.

“Hey, it’ll be alright,” he sat on the bed, and coughed through the dust. “Once the dust has settled,” he laughed.

Ciana smiled falsely.

“Yeah,” he stood. “A lick of paint and they’ll be great,”

“I want my room dad.”

“I know, I’m sorry. And, I’m sorry we didn’t get much time. But, Grumps, I couldn’t turn the job offer down. Plus, this house is great, and so cheap that we can afford to holiday for the next few years. One day you’ll understand why we’ve done this.”

“I know,” she sighed. “But this is all someone else’s stuff. Why is it still here?” Opening the wardrobe, she found clothes and shoes all neatly bagged as if they were new.

Ryan stood next to her, looking through the items. “I knew about the furniture, that was in with the house, but the clothes are a bit…excessive.”

“They’re for a 5 - year-old-girl.”

“Too small for you then,” he laughed. “I’ll tell you what. Unpack your stuff, and place all these bits in the boxes. I’m sure there’s a thrift shop in the town we can take them all to.”

“Don’t you find this whole place weird?” She glanced out the window, looking at the house opposite. “And, that guy Malcolm?”

“Yeah, he was a little over friendly,” Ryan smiled manically just like Malcolm had.

“Stop it,” she laughed.

“That’s better.” He clapped his hands together, “Right, let’s get this place sorted and then we’ll have takeaway tonight. Just hope your mother hasn’t unpacked the kitchen yet, we don’t want her cooking anything special on the first night!”

“I heard that!” Rhianne shouted.

Ryan grimaced and Ciana laughed. “Ok, Grumps?”

“Sure,” she smiled.

“Cool, come and help me get the rest of the boxes from the van.”

From the corner of the street Ben watched them unpacking. They seemed like a nice family. Friendly. He had heard the others talking about new people moving in, but he didn’t realise it would be this soon, and he didn’t know how many more there would be.

Ryan sat back, throwing his used napkin onto the table. “Well, that was a nice pizza.”

“Can I have another slice?” RJ asked.

Ciana hadn’t even eaten a whole slice, she’d just pushed it around the plate. “They don’t even deliver to here. Other people are scared of this place, Dad. What does that tell you?”

“It’ll do wonders for my figure, this way,” Rhianne smiled.

Ciana pushed her plate towards RJ and stood. “No, this town is such a weird place, that no one and I mean no one will come near it. Do you know where my laptop is?”

Rhianne took a moment to think, “It might be in your bag, that was in the car. Why?”

“Because I’m going to go and update my friends, and research this hell hole you’ve dragged me into.”

“Don’t…” Rhianne started to say.

Ryan stopped her, “Just let her go, she’ll be okay.”

Ciana grabbed her bag from the hallway and ran up to her room. Closing her door, she sat on her bed and emptied her bag out. The box of clothes and toys that once lined the room sat on the floor. Even with the lights on, the room gave her goosebumps. So, she stood, opened the door and simply slid the box out.

“That’s better,” she sighed, and switched her laptop on. As soon as it sprang to life, it looked for local WIFI but couldn’t find anything. She growled into the pillow which smelt of dust. Then, she spotted her phone and she realised she could use that to get on the internet. The phone was off; she hadn’t wanted to speak to people because leaving had been hard enough. Switching it on, she waited, entered her password and then stared at the bars of signal. There were none. “That’s okay, she told herself, it can take a minute.” She sat, with baited breath just waiting for a glimpse of something. Anything. “Nothing?” She shouted. “Can this place get any weirder?”

Curling around everything that had strewn her bed, she knew there was nothing else to do, but sleep.

###

Her mum was shouting, calling for her.

“What?” Ciana mumbled.

“RJ has gone out to investigate and its getting dark, can you go and get him in please?”

“Argh!” She growled, “I'm asleep.”

“Cici, please?”

Ciana grunted and she sat up, wiping the sleep from her eyes. Her laptop was still open, the time showing she'd only been asleep for twenty minutes or so. The curtains hadn’t been drawn and it was dusky outside. She stomped down the stairs and out the front door.

“RJ?” she called, but the was no answer. “RJ!” She moved across the yard towards the street. The whole time looking for him. The crows squawked at her and fled the trees. She jumped, and watched as they circled above. "Seriously! I have jumped more times in this town than I have spoken! Shoo!” She threatened up to the sky.

The wind picked up, there was no sun anymore, just thick black clouds that caused a darkness. Ciana pulled her arms around her, trying to keep warm through the chill that appeared.

“Ryan-Junior, you come home right now!” She yelled.

It was eerie, there were no other people in the street, but she felt like a million pairs of eyes were watching her. The wind carried on, and she could hear whispers telling her to “leave” and “turn back.” The voice drifted right up to her ear making her batt them away.

As the wind blew it kicked up all the dust from the abandoned gardens, the dust travelled around her creating a fog. The further she walked the thicker it became.

“RJ, please, come on!” She called as she held her hands up to protect her face. Through the fog she could see a silhouette. Someone standing at the side of the road.

“RJ is that you?” She shouted. If she couldn't see, then he certainly wouldn't be able to. “Look there's some freaky storm coming, we have to get back. Mums going mad!” She ran towards him, tripping over the curb as she grew closer. She landed on her knees and scrambled to get up. The dust started to settle, and she could see it wasn't RJ but a man hanging from a hangman's noose. 

Ciana screamed and scrambled backwards. The dust receded more and she could see the streets were lined with people, men, women and children all hanging from nooses. Their legs swung in the breeze and their dead eyes all stared ahead.

Ciana screamed again, and again trying to move away, but everywhere she turned there were more bodies. She sunk to the floor and placed her hands to her face, screaming into the night,

Ben smiled to himself. He couldn't help it. It was the only joy he got - interfering with their dreams. His hand sat on Ciana’s forehead as she slept. She lay on the bed tossing and turning, her breath leaving in gasps as the nightmare rampaged through her mind.

"Ben?"

"What?"

“Don't tease her, it won't make her go.”

“They can't be here, Anais. It's not safe.”

Anais put her hand on his. “We just deal with the fact that they are. And, more will come.”

He removed his hand from her head, a little smile sat on his face. Ciana stopped tossing and turning, settling into a more relaxed sleep. Ben turned to Anais, her fiery red hair and fiery red eyes glowing through the dark. “The shadows are growing.”

“I know.” She stood by him and looked at Ciana as she slept. “You like her, don't you?”

“No!” He said abruptly.

“She’s one of the first new people in this town for a while.”

“Nah,” he laughed. “Just someone new to mess around with.”

Anais grinned. “Never know, you might even attach.”

“No! I don't attach. The minute I do, then I'm in danger with the rest of them.” He ran his hands through his hair, “I just don't want to see anymore taken. Three earlier, and I watched them go. They were too quick.”

“I know,” Anais placed a hand on his shoulder. “Lydia told me.”

“I don't want to hear their screams anymore. If we stop the shadows taking, maybe we will all survive?”

“Maybe,” Anais said with little hope. “Just leave her be tonight, it's their first night here, don't you think they've had enough with all that moving?”

He nodded but wasn’t convinced. “One more warning won't hurt.” Ben leant in close, his face almost touching Ciana’s. "Leave this place, and never come back!" He whispered in her ear.

Ciana felt the breath on her skin and she awoke with a start. She could see someone standing in the shadows. She froze and stared at the silhouette, waiting for it to move.

"Oh crap..." Ben whispered and vanished with Anais.

It wasn't until Ciana’s eyes adjusted to the light she realised it was her clothes hanging on the cupboard door. She let out a sigh of relief and settled back down. Within seconds she was asleep again.

Watchers Chapter Two

Watchers

Chapter Two

From the back seat of the car, Ciana just kept shaking her head. “Why here, again?”

Her mum, who was trying to concentrate on the road and the satnav, replied, “You know why! Your dad has a new position in his company, which meant moving. It just so happened the houses around here are going really cheaply, and we’re not far from the new factory.”

Ciana glanced out of the window, watching the houses go by. “I’m not surprised they’re so cheap,” she muttered. Each house that whizzed past looked abandoned. Some houses still had cars in the driveway, but the lawns were overgrown. It was weird.

“Please, just give it a chance,” her mum whispered.

“Oh cool!” RJ, Ciana’s little brother, called. “Look!”

“What?” Ciana sneered. There was nothing cool about this town, it was all weird.

RJ turned on the seat and stared out of the rear window, his arms pushing down the mountain of possessions that filled the boot. “There was an old building, with a load of the walls missing and there was a cemetery.”

Ciana rolled her eyes and shuddered, “Really cool.” She leant through to the front, “Please do not tell me that I left all my friends and our house to live here, where a cemetery is the town highlight!”

“Ciana,” Rhianne sighed with an aggressive undertone. “It’s a lovely town and a really nice house. We haven’t seen any of this place yet, just please give it a rest!”

Ciana sat back, arms crossed and sullen. She looked at her brother who was still facing out the back, he smiled and waved. She turned to see their dad, Ryan, driving the rent-a-van behind. She grimaced and faced front, popping her headphones in she turned the music on her phone up full whack.

Five minutes later the car pulled onto a drive of another derelict house, and Rhianne switched off the engine. 

Ciana pulled out her headphones and stared out the window, bemused at the house that sat in front of her. She was angry that they moved, and she was angry that they did it all in hardly anytime at all. But, most of all she was angry because most of her stuff had been thrift-ed away like she had died rather and wasn't moving with them. “I still don’t see why we had to giveaway my bed!”

Rhianne had grown tired of trying the softly, softly approach. There was only so much attitude she could take and she'd been on the receiving end of Ciana's moods for weeks. “Because the house came fully furnished. They’re re-development houses, where they’re trying to build the town up. Something to do with people moving further into the cities meant those that lived here were slowly dying through old-age and no one new was moving into the area. We’re part of the redevelopment.”

“Right.” Ciana climbed out of the car.

“Welcome!” A voice shouted, cheerily.

Ciana jumped and nearly fell back into the car.

The creepy little man had appeared from nowhere and was now staring into the car with a wide-eyed expression, and an over-sized and ugly grin. His hair was a mix of browns and greys, all brushed heavily to one side.

“Welcome!” He said again, and continued to smile. Not once did he blink, nor did his lips meet over his huge teeth.

“Hi?” Rhianne called equally as cheery, as she shut her door.

“Good morning!” He clapped his hands almost doing a little jig on the spot. He looked at each of them. “I’m Malcolm, head of the LittleBridge committee. I’m here to welcome you, and show you around your new home.”

“I think you did that three times,” Ciana muttered under her breath.

Malcolm turned his head, his expression not changing, and watched as Ryan jumped out of the van. “What’s this, welcoming committee?” Ryan laughed to himself.

Rhianne smiled, and through gritted teeth said, “Yes.”

Ryan grimaced, “Oh.”

Ciana couldn’t stop staring at Malcolm and his perfect hair. It was almost like a lego hairpiece; it was so glossy. Even his skin was so smooth and shiny, it could have been plastic.

“Now you are all here, welcome!” He led Rhianne and Ryan towards the house. “This is all yours, and we hope you will be very happy.”

RJ ran off ahead to go and check out the house, while Ciana stayed on the driveway. She leant against the car and looked at the street they were now living in. “Third Avenue,” she muttered to herself. “Not even a proper street name, just a number. And it’s so quiet. Great!”

Each of the houses all looked the same, and there were at least twenty in this road. Each of them were all uninhabited, she could tell. The silence of the street was suddenly cut through by a group of crows flying overhead. They flew towards the house directly opposite her new home, and settled in the trees that sat behind. The trees were so big, they towered over the house and Ciana could see each bird staring down at her.

“Stupid birds!” She growled, “Better not wake me in the mornings!” She noticed one of the curtains move in the house. She took a few steps closer, stepping onto the road.

“So, what do you think?” Malcolm appeared by her side, making her jump again.

“S…Sorry?” She stuttered, trying to hide the fact that he majorly creeped her out.

“About the house?” He grinned, and tilted his head as he looked at her.

“Erm, it seems…nice.”

“Good,” his smile grew wider, which seemed impossible. “You’re going to love it around here. And, there are plenty of friends waiting for you at the school.”

“Yeah,” Ciana regarded him strangely, and backed towards the house.

Malcolm followed her. “So, you must be Ciana?" 

"Yup," she grinned awkwardly. 

“Ciana Crie?” His smile was still there, and she was trying to tell if he was mocking her.

“Yes,” she huffed. She had already endured years of teasing over her name, and she knew she would have to go through it all again at this new school. Years of people saying, “Have you seen Ciana Crie?” and before anyone could answer the response would be, “Well, do you wanna?”

“Did you have anything you want to ask?”

She wanted to know why he smiled like he was a maniac, but she couldn’t. “Who else lives in this street?”

“No one.”

“So no one lives in any of these houses?”

“No,” his smile didn’t falter.

“Oh, maybe it was that flock of birds that made the curtain move.”

Malcolm's eyes flicked towarrds the house, and he nodded, "I would have thought so."

“It’s a murder,” RJ said, he too appeared behind her.

“What?” Ciana gasped.

“A flock of crows, it’s called a murder.”

Malcolm bent down and ruffled RJ’s hair, “Aren’t you a smart fellow?”

RJ nodded and Ciana sneered, “Yeah, a regular Stephen Hawking.”

“Cici,” Rhianne called from inside.

Ciana hated her name and her nicknames given by all, but her grandfather had chosen her name twenty years ago. Her grandfather was a vicar in the town where they used to live, but he had died long before Ciana was born. There was never a reason given as to why she should have that name, it was just forced upon her. But, Cici made her feel like a handbag-dog. “What?”

“Help your brother get stuff out of the car please?”

She rolled her eyes and followed RJ to the car.

“I will be seeing you around,” Malcolm waved.

Ciana turned to wave goodbye but he was gone, vanished into thin air. “Weirdo!”

“Who?” RJ asked.

“Malcolm, he’s just weird.”

“Your weird,” he replied.

“Shut it, Freak!”

RJ ran towards the house shouting, “Mum, Ciana called…”

Pulling the things from the boot, Ciana couldn’t shake the feeling that she was being watched. She looked back to the house where the curtain had moved, just waiting to see a face or some kind of life. But there was nothing.

Is sex the answer? - reviewers think yes!

Can you outrun the past? Ellie is trying but at 24 rebuilding her life shouldn't be the main priority. Hiding from the past she falls unwittingly at the feet of Hollywoods greatest star - can they out run the past together? Full of passion, thrills and humour! Great review left by site What Nikki Read, great review thank you!!!

http://whatnikkiread.weebly.com/my-reviews.html

***Try it now at www.ntaylorauthor.com*** or amazon http://amzn.to/15g6joj

Sales going well - Thank you all

Sale Going well, Thank you to all who are taking advantage of the limited time offer. The sequel will be released soon and you will be the first to know!

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**SALE NOW ON**

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SALE NOW ON!!!

The Desire to Touch is is less than half price for a week only - give it a go!!

NOW ON FACEBOOK

Hey all,

I now have a facebook page as well as Twitter:

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twitter.com - @ntaylortdt

Follow me for up to date news and offers - sale starting later today on the book before the release of the sequel..

The new book cover is out!!!

Hey all,

Well as they saying "Never judge a book by it's cover." Well they do and i opted to have a new cover made for The Desire to Touch and i think it looks pretty damn good. Thanks to Andrew Campbell @ http://kindlebookcovers.weebly.com/ - He does a professional job at an affordable price!

Here it is:

The Desire To Touch First Chapter

As Promised here is the censored first chapter

 (please note these books are for 18+ due to sexual content and explicit language.)

Chapter One

“What the… ouch, my head hurts, what have I done this time?” Still drunk I arouse from a comatose state trying to find some familiarity through the haze of blurry eyes and pounding hangover, as to where I am.

“My arm, I can’t feel my arm…Oh my God…Oh my God!”

I start to panic, thinking someone’s sawn off my arm like some kind of horror movie. Taking a look up, I see I’ve fallen asleep with my arm above my head and entwined with the wooden headboard. All the blood has run out of it leaving it numb. I lay my head down and breathe a sigh of relief. I look up again; laughing at my hysterical thoughts and, like a brick being launched off the top of The Eifel Tower, my arm comes smacking down to earth and wallops me in the face.

“F***!” I start breathing rapidly through my mouth, trying to curb my urge to scream and cry. “S***! oh wow that hurts!”

Looking around the stark white room I can’t see anything familiar, but boy, does my head hurt and now, so does my nose! I lay my head back down as the four inches I had it levitated was like pure torture, and the taste of blood is now running down my throat. Ok ceiling, do I recognise you? Not my ceiling…ok body we need to get up and see where we ended up last night. I sit myself up, wow its bright in here, I have to squint to try and see through the brash light streaming into the room from the balcony doors. Cupping my nose with my good arm I realise I am on a bed but it’s not my bed. I’m fully clothed and that’s a good sign, my angelic side pats herself on the back but my devilish side is still asleep.

Using my one functioning arm I shuffle to the end of the bed so that my feet are grounded, with my left arm hanging limp by my side.  Slowly standing up towards the light, minding my now bleeding nose, I rub my eyes and groan in a whispered breath;

“Can today get any worse? Well, let’s face it it’s” - glancing at my watch, “6:25am, so yes its early. I have a day of cack-handedness, butter fingers and falls to look forward to.”

Standing with a slight shake I realise where I am and looking on the floor I can see some familiar faces still unconscious from the night before. Stepping over numerous blonde and brunette ladies in burlesque clothing I find my way to Lucas who is sleeping on the couch. He has become a dear friend these past few months and I love him to pieces but there is no excuse for his current sleeping position - one hand down his white suit pants, while the other is half way up some poor blonde’s skirt!

I lean over to grab my bag from beside him and take out my phone, as you never know when a picture of this class could be used, well, for me to rip it out of him later anyway. Poor blondie she’s going to wake up, exchange numbers and expect a call from him but I know Lucas all too well. He’ll string her out for the next week thus, making their working relationship awkward and, I’ve told him before, dating your backing dancers is not healthy work ethic but he’s carefree. I envy him.

Lucas has the looks of a Greek god with his olive skin, emerald green eyes, square jaw line and dimpled chin. His hair is dark and is always perfectly styled to the side, very Sinatra and he has a voice like him too. The women swoon over him constantly offering sex, which he rarely refuses.

Lucas is the headline act in the nightclub ‘Hooch’ owned by notorious playboy wannabe and troublemaker Jerry Fines. Hence the party last night; we had a few too many and all bundled back to Lucas’s apartment to drink more, once Lucas had finished his set with the dancers. I can only assume I passed out on the bed and the others got down and dirty together which does not surprise me, I have witnessed Lucas’s orgies on many occasion but never wanted to join in.

Taking a quick snap of the loving couple; with a little giggle, I tiptoe to the door and slide myself out, making sure not to disturb any of the sleeping beauties. Closing the door behind me with a gentle click as the latch catches, I cup my nose one last time as it is now starting to throb.

I’m not that far from home but walking around Broadway apartments before 7am on a Monday morning is not a great idea, the owner for one - the same Jerry Fines - is not a force to be reckoned with. On a Monday he is always moody and doing the rent knock before the suits leave for work. My uncle always says Jerry has small dog syndrome and I’m not supposed to really be near him, as Jerry knows some bad people. He’s about 5 foot tall with a god awful dyed black perm and he carries more jewellery on his hands and neck then the average pawnshop sells.

I also would like to get home before the streets are heaving with the suiters and booters out to earn a crust, because right now my head’s booming way too much to be making my way through the bustling crowd and my bleeding nose won’t look great.

 Walking fast down the corridor with the elevator in view I start picking up speed, dreaming of a nice hot bath and my bed. Attempting to walk in a straight line I have my eyes fixated on my destination, so much so I do not see the figure stepping out of their door and into my pathway.

BANG - like a steam train to a brick wall - I smack into them. I’m not exactly sturdy in my current condition and now I can feel myself flying backwards and then I land, oh so lady like, on my backside.

“Ssshhhhhugar….b****y hell that hurts.” I sob quietly, but loud enough, to emanate my pain.

In my still drunken state I scramble to my knees muttering all kinds of curse words. Not looking up I place my hands on my thighs and I’m trying to catch my breath, “Sheesh does no one look where they are going anymore? Don’t mind me, just bowl me over…and ouch my b****y nose!”

Cupping my nose once again as I can taste fresh blood; I lift my upper body up, with my knees still firmly grounded, only to find I am eye level with a very nicely suited crotch. My mouth drops open and I am just staring. ‘What is wrong with me, come on woman, get up off the floor. Stop looking at this mans well-hung parts.’ My devilish side whispers in my ear, ‘Keep staring, at least if the face is nothing to look at you have this pretty image reserved for later should you need it!’

There’s a cough from above my eye level but I don’t want to move.

The door the crotch appeared from opens once more and a voice says laughing, “Wow Trey, got them falling at your feet this early eh? Here, you forgot your phone.”

I look to the left to see the man at the door.

“Morning ma’am,” with that he chuckles passing a phone above my head and closes the door shut. I feel like I have been staring for about ten minutes but I think it’s only been about one, how do I break this moment without looking like too much of a perve?

There’s a cough from above again. I slowly tilt my head back to see what was above the magnificent weapon in front of my very open, slack jawed, mouth. Well at least I now know  the groin I was staring at has a name.

Breaking the silence this deep soothing voice jests, “Normally I wouldn’t indulge in erm ….” he laughs, “oral this early on a Monday.”

My eyes catch his, I lost all use of my jaw muscles but they, as myself, finally regain composure and are now allowing me to bring my mouth to a shut.

His hand comes down and grasps mine, pulling me up. As his skin touches mine it sends a wave of electrical currents through me, causing goose bumps all across my body, this makes me clench deep down inside. Is this raw sexual attraction I am feeling?

I’m now standing in front of this godly creation, this beautiful man that radiates an astounding sexual essence that makes me quiver deep within. I close my eyes and my ‘angelic side’ mutters dryly in my other ear ‘You’re hung over and you stink, how can you be getting turned on by this situation? Explain how you have possibly broken your own nose, go on see how attractive you are then!’

She shouts the truth and I don’t know how or why but standing there looking into the sparkling blue eyes, so blue it’s like looking into the depths of the ocean, I am getting turned on.

Taking a look over him, I can see he’s wearing charcoal suit trousers that are hugging him in all the right places, a Cargo green tight sweater that caresses his upper torso, showing every inch of muscle on his arms. He has designer stubble all around his strong bitable jaw line. This is all flattered by a mop of mousey blonde hair on top, with perfectly trimmed short back and sides.

“Are you ok?”

Shaking my head trying to clear the unwanted thoughts of jumping his bones, I come back to reality.

“Are you ok?” Trey asks again, still holding my hand.

I cough to clear my throat, “I’m ok, I think.”

My devilish side is hammering at my ear yelling, ‘No, no say you need the kiss of life, faint, play dead, do something!’

“You think?” He asks softly, now stroking the back of my hand.

Sensing how hot and seriously turned on I am getting, I pull my hand away and instantly my defenses go up.

“I was ok, until you bowled me over,” Embarrassment now setting in and sarcasm in abundance, my face is going red, heart rate is quickening and I can feel my private area….well after years of no contact - its yearning.

He laugh’s “I bowled you over did I? I’m sorry I thought I was just leaving my friends apartment but…”

I can feel that the situation is getting more embarrassing and I’m not one for thinking before I speak so with a deep breath I muse, “Apology accepted thanks.”

I flush ruby. His face is so…so wow, I’m sure I have seen it before but I can’t place it.

My angelic side is standing with a clothes peg over her nose, for the fumes of alcohol coming off my skin are immense and I’m shocked he’s not getting drunk from being so close.

His mouth opens in shock then turns to a wry smile; I start to turn to head for the lift. Knowing I have left him speechless has got my inner devil giving me a standing ovation and angel girl too seems impressed. Seeing the stairs are closer I dart for them and as I reach the door he shouts, “I didn’t get your name and your nose is bleeding!”

What am I thinking, how can I have just been so bold to run into him and then get him to apologise for it. I can’t help the nervous giggling as I make my decent down the steps, skipping two at a time. 

I open the door to the lobby and peek my head around trying to see if Jerry is on the prowl. The lobby is mainly a cream colour on the walls and golden décor – trust Small dog to be so brash with the cash and taste, it’s not too bad, but I’ve stayed in better motels.

 I can see the reception desk is empty and Jerry’s door is shut, so now’s my chance to make a break for the street. I take a breath and start to walk briskly for the main door.

 Just as I pass the reception desk I hear the squeak of someone’s shoes on the polished tiled floor.

“Well lookey what we have here!” Jerry’s voice is so creepy, like an old family uncle.  When he’s drunk he gets all slimy and that gross tingling sensation shoots up your spine, making you cringe like you’ve eaten a whole lemon.

I turn to look at him and put on my fake ‘how lovely to see you’ face, “Hi Jerry, how are…”

“Darling, I am all the better for seeing you,” He starts walking over to place his arm around my waist.

Instinctively I step back to stay out of his touch but realise I’m starting to be backed up against a wall.

‘Think god damn it, think woman come up with an excuse……arrrghhh it can’t be that hard!’

“Ellie, Ellie, Ellie,” He says under his breath eyeing me up and down, as he closes in ready to pounce.

‘Crap, think woman think,’ “Sorry Jerry, I can’t stay, I have to…”

“What would your uncle think of you being here?” he tuts.

“Well…,” my hands are on the wall behind me trying to make space for me to crawl into. “He knows me and Lucas are good friends, I really have to go. Sorry Jerry excu…” I attempt to slip past him.

Jerry stops me in my tracks and places his stubby fingers on my hips before I can brush past him. I wince and want to die inside. ‘Ground, swallow me up now!’ Devil girl has the knuckle-dusters at the ready and is standing ready to attack whereas Angel girl has done a runner leaving a ‘Be Back in Five’ sign.

I’m not afraid to bring my knee up swiftly if I have to, bringing all hope of future Fines to an abrupt halt.

“Come now Ellie, you’re here, I’m here, and the mood is so right.”

He’s stepping closer to me and the smell of his old spice is just too much, making the previous night’s alcohol intake work its way back up my throat.

I gag and shiver.

“You ok my little sex kitten?” Imitating a purr he raises his hand to touch my face.

“Yeah, was just a bit sick in my mouth,” Did I just say that?

“Ya what?” he scolds with a matching look upon his very orange face.

“I said I feel a bit sick and need to head out,” oh please, please let that make him move.

He raises his hand to move my fringe out of my eyes but he stops and his face freezes. Shooting a glance to my left I see Trey has appeared and has a firm grip around Jerry’s arm.

A sick feeling runs through my gut, I really don’t want to be caught up in the middle of a confrontation, violence is a no-no in my book. I can feel the heat of panic starting to hit my face, my arms start to shake and my racing heart pounds loudly in my ears.

“Jerry,” Trey says with great ease and calmness, “Could I have a quick chat with you, I think I have seen something you should be aware of?”

Jerry lets go of me and moves toward Trey and I breathe a sigh of relief, the panic starting to drain from my body leaving me feeling worse than when I woke up. I hold onto the wall behind me to steady myself.

Trey starts, “I have just overheard one of the occupants on the fourth floor talking about getting out before rent knocks are due, I wasn’t sure- ”

He flits me a quick wink to let me know he has the situation under control and, with that, I’m off the wall running out of the door. I can hear Jerry cursing about non payers and how he’ll kick them out. Running with such force I snag my jacket on the handle of the door. It catches me for a second but with the force I’m using to remove myself from the building, I just rip straight through it.

After hailing a cab I find myself safely grounded back at home, well if you can call it home. It has been for me for the past 9 months and it looks like it will stay this way for a lot longer.

My home, for now, is ‘Valentines Hotel’, which is smack bang in the centre of New York looking out onto City Hall Park.

 I decide it would be better all-round if I slip in through the service entrance and I may be able to avoid a harsh talking to from uncle B himself. I walk through the service door to see Earl, head of security, chatting up Marianne who is head of Housekeeping. I smile and try to slip by un-noticed, it’s embarrassing enough to see them flirting but to get caught up in it is another thing. Slipping past, I think I’m clean through, when I am called. Turning I see Earl and Marianne smiling at me,

“Your uncle is not happy with you Ellie.” Earl’s amused, he knows only too well what I’m like.

“I didn’t think he would be,” I reply complacently.

“He’s in a meeting till 9, so you have time to run up and shower before he’s giving it ‘the chat’”

“Thanks Earl,” I smile and look at Marianne who is still pinned against the wall by Earl’s arm. “See you Marianne”

“Bye Ellie, oh and if you’re bored later I can always find something for you to do,” laughing she winks and turns back to consume Earls affection and charm.

Once in my apartment and in a nice relaxing bath my mind starts to wonder. Who was that man, my knight in shining armor, just thinking about him has got me all hot and bothered again. Ok enough of this I’m going to call Lucas wake him from his drunken stupor and see how he’s feeling.

After half an hour and the memories of the night before relived, I explain to Lucas about meeting Trey in the hallway and how Jerry tried to jump me. Lucas isn’t happy with Jerry but he is intrigued as to who the handsome stranger could be and assures me he will do some digging around.

We end the call and I sink myself back into the bath. Using my toe I turn the hot tap on again and top up the now lukewarm water, whilst it is filling I reach for my razor and start the ritual of shaving my legs, underarms and bikini line.

 Once I am clean and shaven, I climb out of the bath and avoid seeing myself in the mirror. Quickly I dry myself down, I put my hair in a turban-like style and don my robe.

I can’t help it, I have to see them in the mirror again. I know the doctors said I should leave them to heal but I have to see how it looks now. I open my robe and it parts so my naked body is on show in the full-length mirror.

 There it is, the mother of all scars running from under my right breast in a pattern down to my left hip. I tentatively run my finger across the scar all the way along, the whole time watching myself in the mirror. Then I lift my right wrist and I go to run my fingers across the scar that marks me, but I can’t bring myself to touch this one. I always thought of myself as not quite the right size, too short, hips too wide or just a bit too much skin in need of toning, but looking back I was perfect and now I am a broken shell of what I used to be.

 Come on woman just pick up the phone and book yourself into see the plastic surgeon Uncle Brendan found, it’s been long enough it’ll be safe now. I reach a hand for my phone but curl my fingers away – I close my eyes and think to myself ‘I’ll be fine, it’ll fade,’ I can happily never look there again.

My phone starts ringing again snapping me out of my reverie, I close my robe and grab my phone to find its Meagan ringing. Meagan is my cousin, her father is my uncle, he and his wife Laurie are divorced, but Meagan seems to spend her life at the hotel with her dad. To be fair she’s been a great help settling me in and introducing me to people.

I answer the phone, “Hey you, how’s things?”

“Come to the pool?” She pleads.

I laugh, “I’m fine thanks for asking” I close my eyes and try to think of an excuse, I really just want to curl up and sleep, “Oh not today I..”

“No excuses, come to the pool. Please?” She can be extremely persuasive and whiny when she wants something.

I huff and don’t say anything.

“Look, just come down for a drink and sunbathe, go on, it’ll be fun!” I can hear her smile down the phone, I can even hear her pouting.

“Ok,” I give in, “I’ll be down in 20 minutes, but no drinks, just save me a bed.”

“Oh, I saved you one when I got here earlier.”

“Figures, ok, 20 minutes.” I put the phone down and walk out of the bathroom into the bedroom.

Throwing myself onto the bed I lay and stare at the ceiling, I can do this, a few hours socialising won’t hurt. I clamber off the bed and head for the dresser, rifling through my drawers I find a plum tankini with a blue Lily print and matching bikini shorts. I pull the tankini on making sure the scars are covered, I then put on some blue shorts and a black vest top. I glance in the mirror, and the bags underneath my hazel brown eyes, are going to be a dead giveaway of the hangover I am suffering from. Now, for the hair…I think I’ll pin back my fringe, don’t want no dodgy tan lines, and then put the rest in a high ponytail. I grab my brush and sort my blonde hair into something that looks like a style, I then pin my fringe back so it sweeps to the side.

 Grabbing the nearest bag I can find, I shove in my towel, phone, and any other crap I find loose that I may need. I slip on some white flip-flops and I’m good to go.

 As I leave the room I catch sight of my right wrist, I haven’t put a bangle on. I grab my black thick leather wristband with silver floral detail and strap it over my wrist, it has become a trademark joke between those who know me and I never go out without something covering it.

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Ok so i read 50 shades and The crossfire Trilogy books ....

Right so i read the books along with every other person on the planet, yes i will admit i fell in love with all of them, the story lines and the characters. Anyway like a lot of others out there the "mummy porn" thing took over and i started to buy up anything that was reviewed to be in the category of these books.

Long story short i run out of things to buy so i started to write a book.....8 months later the first one is done and a final 3 months after that the sequel is complete. I have had a few people read it and they all liked it and yes we know friends and family can be biased, but these friends would generally tell me is it was pap.

Right this is the cover which i created myself and the book well...it is an ADULT book and i will censor what i can and post maybe the first chapter or so....depending if people want to read more. The book has been available on Amazon kindle store since 23/03/13

I hope eventually everyone loves reading it as much as i have writing it.